Not so Glorious

I’m a Strong Woman,

I can break all the stereotypes

                                      Don’t judge me by my looks..
                                      As I’m a beauty with Brains

                                      Yes, I’m a multi-tasker,      
                            I can be a Mom or a Model or a CEO,
Change your thoughts & let our fraternity give our dreams a fly, well above all the on-lookers
Wow, that’s like my daughter, you’ve secured highest in Class 12th, one of the best in Biology, I’m so proud of you. You know Srishti, I always wanted to be a Doctor but I could never become one, I really want you to be one, work more hard in the Medical entrance & give my dreams a fly.

But ma ,I don’t want to be a Doctor ,rather my interest lies in pursuing high in Biotechnology & become a scientist ,I wish to do researches on Onco-genes ,which are cancerous cells .Since you are also aware that till date there is no 100% cure for cancer & so many people across the globe lose their lives ,I want to work to give such patients a life of heaven & not hell .

Srishti, that’s fine, but do you know you are an Indian girl, pursuing all these will take so much time of your life, a PHED will itself will take close to 4-5 years & such tedious researches may take many more..Further, I don’t even feel that there are many such institutes in India which can help you pursue your dream.

Hey mom, India does have, but I’m as such targeting an International university which is already into it.

Srishti, I cannot allow you to go abroad.

But why mom? What’s the harm in it? I’m going to pursue something good for human race, I wish to go to US bringing back something innovative & curative attributes .I’m not going there to enjoy or burn out my efficiency in roaming around.

Shrishti ,try to understand beta ,you have 4-5 years to study & then we plan to get you married to some good guy & then pursue what you wish to..What will the society say that we have sent our young daughter all alone?

Mom, your dreams went unfulfilled, now you wish my dream also to remain dream?”

The rugged conversation ended with a deep silence!! Somehow that conversation had a break there but destiny wanted to shower goodies to Shrishti, as she was pretty successful in convincing her Dad, who had always wanted her to nurture her thoughts & fly high!

So a month later, all found her engrossed in filling up the applications for the Entrance tests & with her perseverance she got selected in one of the best universities in California ,where she wanted to be ! Next 3 months which involved in all the preparations, arranging for Student Visa , & packing up the bags ,as she was ready to flyJ

But those days filled up the place with numerous gossips & minds with many agonizing judgements.

See aunty is sending Srishti all alone, she is so vulnerable, they don’t have any known there, how will she cope up?

She just knows how to make a coffee for herself, who will do all the rest for her?

How can they believe the foreigners, just have a look at their culture, I’m dam sure she will come back a ruined child..

You know she could even marry someone & return back..

Blah Blah..What not all did I hear? For the very first time, I felt myself ridden in this stereotypic society, with such a negative blend of mindsets surrounding us. Had it been a boy or for that sake my cousin brothers, these insomniacs would have been clapping & boasting, see he has gone foreign for higher studies.

It happens & yes you have to be strong enough to completely ignore these buzzing bees around, affirming these lines, I moved on to foster my mission .I got the opportunity to work with the best people in this world, which not many people get .Not just professionally but leading a hard life there made me lot stronger personally as well. I learned to cook, clean my dishes, and sanitize my room along with the research for mankind. It had been close to a year I was settled there, when my mom along with one of my aunt longed to visit me . Happily I made all the requisite arrangements, not just to stay but researched a lot to ensure they enjoy travelling around .I had gone completely extrovert, a bold girl sustaining herself to accomplish her dreams.

Welcoming & hugging Mom & Aunt made me a happy being; I longed for an emotional touch & waited for a year to sleep in mom’s lap. But It is often said, people don’t like changes & so my aunt !

“Shrishti it seems you always roam around in a tee & Jeans beta ,don’t forget our Indian Traditions .You’ve also started driving ,in our home town its usually our mates ,the males of family who drive you. I’m not trying to make the environment gloomy but beta don’t forget that you’ll return back soon to Jalandhar & have a different pie of life.”

I couldn’t resist myself , “In India does wearing jeans & Tee ,driving for studies by a girl is looked upon as a disaster? If yes ,let me do the disaster ,I’m still the same Shrishti with respect for elders & people in heart ,I dress up soberly ,I drive for my studies & not roam around ,I’ve learnt to prepare meals ,the one I didn’t for past 16 years ,I’ve learnt to be self dependent in every term which my home didn’t made me. I’m a very much Indian by heart & yes I know where my roots lie at.”

Nothing looking back, I could just see my Mom hugging & praising me all the more!

This was one of the worst stance in my life ,wherein I had to prove to my own family ,It did hurt me ,but yes that’s the challenge in a stereotypic society & I had countered it humbly ,stating that #IAmCapable J ,A girl is capable to handling everything ,she is a multi-takser ,she is an image of Godess ,never ever under estimate the power a woman carries.

It’s actually not shocking to see the way a women is judged, few startling figures that the Nihar Naturals #IAmCapable survey conducted by Nielsen India reveals:

a. 69% of men agree that their judgement of women is based on their looks.

b. 64% of women agree that the judgments passed on them have affected their ability to reach their true potential.

c. 70%of women agree that majority of judgments on women are from family members or friends rather than strangers.

d. 72% of women agree that working women face more judgments on their looks or their clothes than housewives.

Girls, let’s just bang on & break all these classifications, let’s pledge & change the mindsets that people bring along with our physical attributes.

“I’m breaking stereotypes based on appearance by sharing my experience for the #IAmCapable activity at BlogAdda in association with Nihar Naturals.”

Check out one of Nihar Naturals’ #IAmCapable stories in the video below!


Hyderabadi Biryani -With secret spices!!

What ..How can you expect my son to help you out in kitchen. He is the king of home. He’ll just sit back ,relax & enjoy his life.. It’s you who ought to do your daily chores & keep your men happy!!

A distressed Sonia on hearing out these words went back to complete her routine life ,a life which starts with giving her better half, Kareem & in-laws a cup of bed tea ,cleaning the house ,preparing breakfast for them ,serving them hot breakfast & then it’s when she gets time to take breakfast herself. But not in a relaxed manner. It’s hardly 10-15 minutes time as here comes the voice.. Do remember you need to wash the clothes & then prepare sumptuous lunch for us on time!! It had just been 3 months of her marriage & she was completely exhausted .

Oh. What the hell. Am I a work Machine? Don’t I want some special time for myself? Am I not a human & don’t have the right to sit back & relax like Kareem? Why is this male dominated society so self centric? Why are these men not so poignant? Will a small helping hand at cleaning the dining table or washing the clothes not lower down her pressure & she may attribute more time towards her family, a quality time to look at some creativity she has within?

Half day passed on with such thoughts lingering her minds ,when she finally got an hour to relax .Switching between the TV channels restlessly ,she broke into laugh ,when her restless mind saw something unusual…A lovely narration of #Sharing the Load …Instantly she hopped ,pounced ,sat back & started hearing to the poetic lines —

My Better Half, is my best half,

He loves to make me merrier,

He loves encouraging my creativity,

He loves “my quality” time,

He loves my social indulgence,

He loves my poignancy,

He loves discussing matters with me,

& all this is feasible as,

[ “Soniya couldn’t resist…Tring Tring..Tring..Yes soniya, What’s up ?Kareem ,hear out something unusual on the TV & believe me your mind will be forced to accept the truth ,stand for it .But Soniya ,what is it all about? Kareem for just 15 minutes, quietly sit in a closed room & watch…Beep…Beep”]

He is there to give me morning tea, while I’m high time with my kitchen spree,

He is there to cut my veggie, while I’m hunting after our kidzee ,

He is there to clean the dust, while I’m cooking lunch at my best,

He is there to do the laundry, while I binge on the utensils cleaning & drying,

While I pounce on fresh veggies, he is there to catch on Fruits ,

Be it night ,be it day, Be it hot ,be it cold, Be it Rainy ,Be it Dry,

Be it alone, Be it in family,

He is there for me in every need, every pain..

Just to give my life a beautiful name… With #Sharetheload

[Huh!! What was Soniya pointing at? What a home it would have been, where all members do the work equally…How & why had I closed my eyes & mind towards her pain? I took so many vows with her. Why have I left her in a lurch? It had been very mean of me..I’ll apologize, for sure …]

“Tring Tring..Hey mom!! Give receiver to Soniya Pls..Kareem Baba, you are aware that at this time she is busy preparing snacks & tea for us, I cannot ask her to leave it & have a lovely gala time with you!

Mom, pleading..Just once…Here came Soniya with a hiding smile..Yes Kareem, I’m there to listen to voice, I’m there to listen to your Orders..

Soniya ,No…Pls I apologize ,I heard ,I thought ,I co-related & I felt your pain terribly..You will no longer face all this, as I’ll be there for you from today itself..Hung up!

Couldn’t believe her ears …Will have to wait & watch, just then door bell rang.Kareem..So early ..Yes dear, I’m there to cook special Hyderabadi Biryani for you today…”[And the secret Spices were that of Love ,Care & respect for Soniya]

Tears fell from her eyes ,with a heavy heart ,Kareem & Soniya hugged each other & again vowed for a new start!

From that day till today ,Kareem has held Soniya’s hand to make their struggling house a beautiful home ,to part away their miserable lives with enchanting ways ,they watch movie every week & dance together every night !

Such a bliss has their life become ,Soniya’s Treasure Hunt “Smile” has become an all time “Shine”. Every minute is a rejoicing moment whether they are working separately or together!!

Well ,It would have had been such a lovely family ,if all Indians would have come out of the mental blocks & recommended the #ShareTheLoad initiative. But still behind in the society in many towns & cities ,many such Soniya’s reside ,for whom this is a brilliant initiative taken by Ariel.

Me, a working mother living in a nuclear family has seen ample of challenges with respect to prioritizing house chores or Managing office work ,there has been many moments wherein you have in-laws & relatives coming over to spend a quality time & then it becomes a task to manage but with support ,its so easy to manage!

Well, every female including Soniya deserves a partner/household who is there to share her load physically as well as emotionally. With the changing times, when women is multi-tasking, when she has started ruling corporate life, there has to be an environment of equality within the household, be it a nuclear or a joint family.

My better half #SharetheLoad :)

My better half #SharetheLoad 🙂

Sharing the load is not just between a husband & wife ,rather it is between a family ,every member of the family ,It is the very beginning for the foundation of a happy home ,a basic seed which grows into the tree of care ,love & mutual respect .Be it Joint or Nuclear family ,all basic chores as Cleaning ,washing ,grocery ,Kids need to be divided amongst the couples/members basis the time & life style.

All these acts need to be mutually decided & carried on with a consistent “SMILE” which would ease up the load of life & make it more enjoying!!Such a house would definitely be called a “Paradise on earth” ,wherein the space is occupied by “Love” , “care” , “Compassion” & is devoid of “Rude” , “Jealousy”, “Self Centric” !! Let’s enliven our HOMES:)

“I am writing for the #ShareTheLoad activity at in association with Ariel.”